Bracing for the HEAT!

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Projections indicate that temperatures will hit a whopping 107 degrees Fahrenheit this Wednesday in the big "NO". So, I can be certain that the bitching quotient will rise with the temps. Actually, for the most part, this Summer has been pleasant. Usually by this time we would have had at least 3 weeks of triple digit temps.

So, here is a list of activities one can indulge in while the heat is raging.

1. Hopping movies (at least 3) at an air conditioned movieplex. (Slightly illegal but half the fun is getting away with it.)
2. If you don't feel like driving... watching movies in one's darkened and air-conditioned room with lots of cold drinks and cold fruit within easy reach. ( Bonus being that you could always hit "pause" for a short nap... plus you can eat and drink whatever you desire.)
3. If you want to save money on power bills... enticing a friend with the same plan, then going over to "share the experience". ( Depending on the friend... a short nap could have all sorts of possibilities.)
4. Hanging out in a cool dark bar, getting blotto, hitting on the fine waitress... suggesting "watching movies in one's darkened and air-conditioned room with lots of cold drinks and cold fruit within easy reach"... at her place on her day off, tomorrow. (Could save you money... could get you "some"... could get you a swift hard kick to the nuts... could get you "86 ed")
5. If the ploy works... score!
6. If the ploy with the waitress and friend didn't work... ice cubes down the pants... while watching... yada, yada,
7. Inventing the "ice cube pants" that one could wear in public from which you will make millions!
8. Formulating the funny "blue balls" advertizing campaign to sell the "ice cube pants" that will up your potential fortune to billions.
9. Contemplating actually getting out of bed to go to the computer to begin work on this brilliant idea and plan of execution that will set you up for the rest of your life.
10. Deciding it's too much work on an afternoon this hot... hitting the "pause" button, reaching out for some cold fruit and settling in for a nap in your darkened, air-conditioned room.

What's your list for a hot afternoon?

26 Responses to “Bracing for the HEAT!”

  1. Blogger blitheringblogs 

    Over here we work in different money.... whats 107 in olde english?

    I like the idea of icecube pants (do you mean American pants or do you mean English underpants type pants?!)

    Over here, we would probably resort to getting out the sewing machine and dadapting that cooler bag that never gets used! (Wartime mentality still hangs in there)

    We also dont have much in the way of air con here... we would sweat in the multiplex, and swelter in the bar. The barmnaid would be 57, mutton dressed as lamb with a tight bleach jeans and a cleavage that could drown a mouse. She would grumpy in the heat and probably give you a big slap.

    Ice cubes down the pants would be best bet, but most freezer compartments here are so small we can only fit in a tray of 12 which wouldnt last long, especially in a party situation.

    Ho hum.

  2. Blogger lecram sinun 

    Blith, Temp would read 41.7 on your side of the pond.

    Right now I'm thinking that the "cooler pants" may work better on your side of the pond - re: the no air-con situation.

    Over here... the "freshness" of the waitress would depend on the bar.

  3. Blogger airplanejayne 

    I think Johnny Depp and Brad Pitt would make for a hot aftern--

    oh...not that kind of hot?


  4. Blogger Lelly 

    Hey, thats ma daddy you're talking about, AJp (you have to 'go to the store' after you wrote that comment, hmmm??)

    And Blith, you once said I has a cleavage you could drown a mouse is that a good or a bad thing, eh, eh??!!

  5. Blogger blitheringblogs 

    alas poor lelly, your wonderous cleavage is wasted on me. But i am concerned about the mouse population in Brighton.

  6. Blogger blitheringblogs 

    P.S. 41 degrees?! flippin heck Tucker! We reached a record 40 degrees two years back and our garden furniture started melting.

    Me and my neighbours are all red heads and we just can't cope in that kind of heat. try as we might to look attractive, we just look pink and sweaty and uncomfortable and it just aint nice...not a spec of bronzed flesh to be seen.

    Good luck to you guys out there in Hotland, my sympathies go out to you all and I hope your "fanning arms" are in fine fettle.

  7. Blogger lecram sinun 

    We are praying that the power grid stays open. It went down a few years ago when we hit 111 F (that's 43.8 for you) and it was not a happy time. Even the explanation that "its a dry heat" made us want to get violent with whomever said it.

  8. Blogger kien lim 

    The hottest I've experienced is 44 C in Tokyo.

    1. Ice cream - Phish Food (Ben & Jerry's), Magnums ( the different varieties), Mars ice cream, Snickers, et cetera
    2. Black Cow
    3. Fine Mist dispenser
    4. No pants or clothes
    5. Yup, the cinema
    6. Yup, shopping for ice cream at a supermarket
    7. Wet T shirt
    8. Ok, ice cube pants
    9. Personal blower
    10. Ahem

  9. Blogger lecram sinun 

    personal blower??? Oh, for "nap"...

  10. Blogger kien lim 

    oh ok, maybe not the cinema

  11. Blogger kien lim 

    yeah, you know, does wonders for the heat.

  12. Blogger thereminman 

    here's one for Lecram:
    call me with that NUMBER you promised me> GEEZ!
    ok, and then go over to a new and melodious blog:

    cut and paste it baby!

    ok, and then all the other ice, and blower stuff. But first things first m'lad.

  13. Blogger scarysquirrelman 

    1. on a lounge chair under a sprinkler
    2. on a beach towel under a sprinkler
    3. mad dash to millerton lake
    4. madder dash to shaver lake
    5. getting turned down by an ice maiden (though the freeze only lasts until the humiliation sets in)
    6. a cold shower after a very, very hot day at work
    7. barbecuing at lecram's while airplane jayne has a waterhose fight with jade ed...actually that's getting me hot, so forget that one
    8. cuba libres
    9. a cellar-temperature guinness
    10. blogging right now

  14. Blogger airplanejayne 

    1)Memo to blith: forget lack of air conditioning, ice cubelet pants and old barmaid. Move to Fresno.
    2)Memo to Lecram: ice pants - kinda like those cargo pants from a few years back. Don't care how FUNCTIONAL they are, they are still UNATTRACTIVE. and "unattractive" means that you all will continue receiving #5 on SSM/Joel's list.
    3)Memo to kien: don't understand any other kind of blower EXCEPT a personal one. any clarification? or have you left for the store...again?
    4) Memo to SSM: okay, so if you're doing #10 now, hurry and run outside and do, imagine #7, snap open eyes, run in house and finish with a rousing #6!

    okay, I've got to get back to my hot afternoon cure(s).

  15. Blogger lecram sinun 

    APJ, does this afternoon "cure" involve ice cold sanka?

    And it's not ice cubelet... it's CUBE... we have enough problems. we really don't need the ice having esteem issues.

  16. Blogger jade ed girl 

    Ok- so how does trying to sleep, but can't because of coughing, fever that nearly matches expected high for today and a dog that doesn't understand "quit touching meeeeeee!!!!" sound?

    Yup- I'm miserable... can't even think of a witty response to "personal blower." Give me a day or two...

  17. Blogger thereminman 

    cuba libra?
    wasn't that the legendary Goat Sucker? (different than "personal blower" I think we're talking about a sort of vampire for little four legged creatures to scare their creature-lings with at night)

    Sorry to hear of the illness JadeEd--
    hopes for betterness soon.

  18. Blogger airplanejayne 

    Jade - so sorry you're sick. tell dog you will flea dip her (show her box) if she doesn't quit touching you.
    Okay Lecram, Cubelets will no be referred to as cubes. Suppose since NOTHING related to "that" comes in size small.....

    and yes, ice cold sanka is cure-all after Depp and Pitt...I'm sure if you asked Jade, even in her fevered state, she would back me up on this.

  19. Blogger Lelly 

    Bah! Wrote a great long comment then lost it by pressing the wrong bleedin' button! Must be suffering from the heat!

    Hope you feel better soon, Jade.

  20. Blogger kien lim 

    Well, there are professional blowers.

  21. Blogger airplanejayne 

    dirrty, dirtty, diirrtty boy....

  22. Blogger Mustang 

    Popsicle enemas

  23. Blogger airplanejayne 

    but mustang --
    wouldn't that make you
    dump a grumpy?

  24. Blogger jade ed girl 

    My God- have you all had fevers?!!
    I woke up singing Depeche Mode's ...your own..Personal... no not Jesus, but BLOWER, thank you very much.

  25. Blogger airplanejayne 

    and then we move on over to INXS:

    "....a new sen - sa - tion!"

  26. Blogger jade ed girl 

    Actually saw INXS once- the guy standing next to me went to the store...well not actually the was more of a "fund transfer" I guess. It was pretty bizarre.

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